We Repeat What We Don’t Repair

by Jamie Milne

Good old life has a funny way of teaching us lessons.

And wouldn’t it be incredible to view these lessons as wisdom from the past, not wounds of the past.

See when there is something we need to learn, something that we need to work on, the same situation will continue to repeat itself until we either gain the learnings, reintegrate them, heal, make a shift, or transform. If not, we will exhaustingly repeat the cycle.

An example of this is when we duplicate toxic relationships. We leave a relationship, enter into a new one, and the new partner looks different, yet the behaviours we avoided facing are the same.

Struggle, failure and pain are all intricate pieces of the puzzle that makes you who you are. When you shy away from struggles, hide away from failure or repress your pain, you stay an incomplete picture.

What many of us fail to realise is that wisdom, strength and fuel for the future is wrapped up inside our pain, and the key to understanding this is what we make it mean, how we create meaning from our pain.

As Bruce Lipton famously said, “We are responsible for our life, the moment we become responsible for our life.”

If you are sitting around waiting on somebody to save you, to fix you, even to help you, you are wasting your time.

Only YOU have the power to move your life forward.

So, try this activity today. Think of an event, in your past, look at it objectively, with a balanced, neutral mind, seeing both sides.

What are the benefits, opportunities, and positives of that event? Find them in even the really challenging past events.

Write all those down in one column, and in another column write the drawbacks, setbacks and negatives, equal to the other column, aim for 30 of each.

We must endeavour to steer away from a subjective bias, meaning a polarised mind, opinion.

This helps dissolve negative emotional charge and allows us to look at our past, all through the ages and gain the wisdom from our perceived wounds, and not metaphorically bleed out from them.